Tuesday, December 1, 2009

BOOM...our first kills


OK....I like PVP. Just got my first kills tonight. Our resident trouble maker, Urkal, got shot at and asked for RR support...I got my really poorly trained Ruppy and warped off to assist. He had a BC pinned down, but couldn't break his tank (because we're soo newbie still)...it was just a matter of time before Urkal's BS would have to retreat. Then the MR thought it would be a great idea to sic his drones on me. Um...now he's got two Ninjas that can shoot him. So I warp off to get my newbie Tech I BS. As I'm changing out my ship, a rifter comes to the aid of the BC MR stoopie who has bit off more than he can chew. Another Ninja shows up to keep Urkal's BS alive until I get back. I come back and add my DPS to the fight. 2xBS = the BC pops...then my heavy drones absolutely crush the Rifter. Wow...my heart was beating out of my chest. So much fun!

Here's the chat:


Urkal > if anyone doesnt want to salvage there mission ill do it for you and split it 50/50

[Urkal's patented..."invite me to your fleet and I'll steal all yo shit" ploy. After two months...people still fall for it...like tkaz1599 yesterday]

Marius Krolyk > Might want ot be carefull aboiut trying to loot wrecks from someone flying a drone boat

[He actually starts talking smack as he chases Urkal's Vigil away....ooops, the NEENJAHS return and ATTACK!]

Marius Krolyk > Wow took you a while and took 3 of ya.
Urkal > Tears.... mmmmmm..... Tears
Urkal > wana rep me
Urkal > ?
tkaz1599 > wow u n ur cloaker? [Urkal's earlier victim]
Marius Krolyk > Nah but takes a big man to call in 2 other pilots to take down a mission fitted bc in highsect
kaz1599 > hahaha lol
Marius Krolyk > Pretty lulzy
tkaz1599 > yah he cloaked himself and ganked me yesterday lol took a ganked typhoon to take my hurricane
Faytar > so let me get this straight then - you both still got ganked and it was by people who suck - what's that say about you?
Marius Krolyk > Hmmmm 3 pvp fitted ships vs a mission fitted bc..........
Marius Krolyk > Doesn't take much skill
Marius Krolyk > Sorry I did have help
Marius Krolyk > A rifter with no ammo
Marius Krolyk > lol
Faytar > lol - we haven't even fully trained half the skills needed to put up a fight
Faytar > you got ganked by the 3 stooges dude
Faytar > our rr ships ran out of cap in like 30 secs
Marius Krolyk > Yeah pretty much 3 stooges who apparently fail at math. 3>1

[Guess he forgot that he started the cascade of events by shooting, not one, but two ninjas! Stoopie! He was the designer of his own demise.]

Faytar > you mean .33+.33+.33 = 1
Marius Krolyk > And 3 PvP fits > 1 pve fit in pvp fight
Marius Krolyk > Granted if you jump into a fair fight you're doing it wrong but picking out folks in mission space is pretty damn low
Marius Krolyk > Hmmmm and my freebie ship is bugged. Great night for me I see
Faytar > all the current guidance is pretty clear - don't shoot ninjas unless you are ready and willing to get ganked, triple teamed, etc...
Marius Krolyk > Blah blah blah
Urkal > omg stop crying i cant eat anymore tears
Faytar > lol
Marius Krolyk > Wow you are so desperate for tears you are fabricating them
Marius Krolyk > Scroll back and try to comprehend (difficult I konw). And pat yourself on the back for needing 3 people to take out 1. And not even a gank kill. That crap when pretty damn slow
Marius Krolyk > My corpie switched ships and took 3 gates to get here
Marius Krolyk > And he didn't even bring any ammo!
Marius Krolyk > Which that was just full of win on his part BTW
Sarkor Nafaar > isn't that the definition of a tard?
Faytar > lol - he was nearly as effective as me and Sarkor and our 30 sec rep ships
Marius Krolyk > I'd like to disagreee but......
Faytar > lol
Marius Krolyk > Hell all he brought was a webber
Sarkor Nafaar > well...i know i got to train some more repair skills...those reppers ate some serious cap
Faytar > I think I repped one volley
Marius Krolyk > Yeah which is why I was hoping my corpie had a nos or destabilizer loaded........
Marius Krolyk > But alas
Faytar > it's kinda like I didn't repair him as much as I shined his windows
Sarkor Nafaar > yeah...that woulda hurt us big time

Granted these guys weren't the most stellar players in the world...we still were victorious. As I look back though, a Tech 2 BC player and some real help from a corpie who didn't forget ammo woulda probably kicked our asses...NINJA LUCK was on our side.

Sunday, November 22, 2009

My first Ransom....[pats self on back]

Warp to this BS Mission site...all alone...start to salv/loot...in pops a Scythe. Scan him...he's harmless with salvs/tractors...I keep going. I get close and he launches a drone at me. I speed away...all the while...continuing to loot. [select all/drag to cargo] [rinse/repeat]

He convos me and says...hey...don't take my mission drop. Mission drop you say...Hmmm...this sparks my interest. This is like telegraphing a punch in an MMA fight. Don't do that. Bad things happen.

What the heck...check my cargohold. What's this...Archive Passkey?!? I link it to him and he really starts to whine and squirt tears. Epic Arc...He's gotta have it....boo hoo. I extracted 4 million from him. I probably could have gotta more, but I was happy to reach this milestone.

Cha-ching!

The War has ended...


Well...we were war dec'd by someone we had stolen/salvaged from. Imagine that...we hurt someone's feeling. This furry tear-maker convinced his merry band of tards to "destroy" us. "The Scary Door" was our enemy.

Wow...underwhelming, to say the least. Within 24 hours, we knew everything about their corp. (thxs to the Internets!) We knew who was in the corp, found their website, found their killboard, deducted there skills/ship capabilities, knew their hunting grounds, analyzed when they played (from their kills/loss times), etc., etc. We enacted a few "top secret" tactics and began our campaign against them. Since we can't field a credible fighting force yet, we went with what I know best...guerrilla tactics. (and my wife said I'd never use my Green Beanie skills again...bah) Needless to say...we toyed with them. We gave them targets to shoot...operating freely from our base. We even un-docked a Mammoth for them to try to kill. As it slowly turned 180 degrees (takes a maddeningly long time), they tried, with all their might, to kill it. (Warp core stabs filled the lows...har!) Away it went...wow...that created alot of tears and embarrassment.

After two weeks of constant demoralization, they quit the war. They camped us mercilessly. Killed nothing. Shot at us routinely. Taunted us without response. (Radio Listening Silence) We gave them nothing, but we feasted on their un-fulfilled rage.

Bottomline: They ain't too scary.

Sunday, November 8, 2009

Success!!!

LOL...we got war dec'd. Yeah for the home team! Gotta be doing something right.

Due to Corp OPSEC rules...we cannot comment on war activities or stories. But, dang...they are seriously funny.

Monday, November 2, 2009

WTFWHEREDIDMAHOREGO?

The scourge of the system...aptly named: WTFWHEREDIDMAHOREGO. A hauler designed to warp on top of a jetcan, take ALL the ore in it, and warp away...time on station: 2 secs. Found this on battleclinic: http://eve.battleclinic.com/loadout/28484-Mammoth-wtfwhostolemyore.html

This thing is pretty funny...I can't fly a Mammoth yet, but my Hoarder does just as well.

Was bored and flying around laying waste to Jetcan'ers, when I came across a crafty miner. She saw me come in and take a full load of ore. 6591 m3...sports fans! Yarr!

No tears in local...huh?!? Afk miner? So, what the heck...lots of ore in that can...lets go for another round. Warp back in, right on top of the can, setting up for another "full load" theft. Where did she go? Don't care...

[Aligning to base...right click, select all...drag to my cargo...]

BOOM! In warps...i'm guessing, a bad-ass Rifter to teach me a lesson. [Mash Warp button harder] In comes the scram...nada. Warp Core stabilizer ftw! Away I go...

She's obviously pissed...in local, she begs me to come back...

Being a douchebag that I am...[Warp to 0]

[I see you - dopey miner in a Rifter!]

Rinse/Repeat: Warp In, Align, Fill-up the hold, no more can...you lose, War...p!

BOOM!...another scram attempt. Har! 2x Core Stabs FTW. Warp away successful!

All she said in local was..."Ah, you have two points...sigh" Guess that scrambler she quickly fitted didn't work so well...dee dee dee.

Yep...another successful day of preying on the stupid.

Sunday, October 25, 2009

I love the "giving" nature of players...

Had two very charitable folks give me a bunch of Tech II gear today...very thoughtful to help out new players in EVE. Very commendable community here...

Canis Legion > Sup Sarkor
Canis Legion > I got a can full of stuff here if you want to just grab that
Sarkor Nafaar > :-0
Sarkor Nafaar > :-0
Sarkor Nafaar > Whoa...this game really punishes the stupid....
Marcus starcaster > go fuck yourself
Sarkor Nafaar > your tears are very tasty
Marcus starcaster > i'll be back
Sarkor Nafaar > to die and give me more of your Tech II loot?
Marcus starcaster > bitch....
Sarkor Nafaar > nom nom nom nom....i'm getting stuffed
Marcus starcaster > i put you on my "bitcj list"
Marcus starcaster > one day, i'll salvage your werk.
Sarkor Nafaar > promise?
Marcus starcaster > promise :)
Sarkor Nafaar > i think i loves you
Marcus starcaster > i think, i really hate you because you were in range of my smartbomb.
Marcus starcaster > and my "stay out of here" announcemnt..... was a big "error"
Sarkor Nafaar > not so smart...getting concorded like that....
Marcus starcaster > i can become a long term joke.
Marcus starcaster > or a best eve video of the month on youtube
Marcus starcaster > but one day. I'll salvage your werk. i want my tech2 loot back.
Canis Legion > Sometimes it's best just to leave them salvagers to themselves :P It tends to cause more harm to yourself to try to do anything about it
Marcus starcaster > tx for the advice....
Sarkor Nafaar > I concur; we can co-exist peacefully. No need to try to shoot my little frigate...
Canis Legion > That, and no one ever knows how many friends you have
Canis Legion > Scared the hell out of me earlier until I realised I wasn't glitching- the tractor beams were yours
Marcus starcaster > gayzor.
Sarkor Nafaar > lol... Yeah you were cool.....thx
kaizoku ojisama > yall talk like two beavers at a wooden spoon convention!!!!
Lambeau Field > lol
Marcus starcaster > change tractor beam by "ass" and werck by "cock"
Marcus starcaster > the conversation is so "nice"
Marcus starcaster > sarkor, i'll salvage your werk.
Sarkor Nafaar > [Refueling Operation Engaged]....[Whine pumps operational]....[Transferring your tears to Warp Core]...[Your QQ fuel me]

Chalk up three more "Concordokken"s for me...

My hangar is filling up with stuff i can't use yet...must...train...faster...

Tuesday, October 20, 2009

Captain Obvious

So...there I was flying around trying out my new cruiser in a PVE mission...

As I was flying from system to system, spamming a recruitment message to get some more folks in the corporation...I get a convo from a concerned citizen of New Eden warning me of unscrupulous elements in my corporation.

Sinistar Ice > hey
Sarkor Nafaar > hi
Sinistar Ice > i just saw your local post for recruiting
Sinistar Ice > you know you have a ninja salvager in your corp?
Sarkor Nafaar > really?
Sinistar Ice > yup
Sinistar Ice > urkal
Sinistar Ice > he's been in a few of my mission sites trying to ninja my wrecks
Sarkor Nafaar > wow...that's crazy...
Sinistar Ice > i use an alt with me to salvage
Sinistar Ice > so i'm not really bothered by it...
Sarkor Nafaar > good idea
Sinistar Ice > but it will draw the attention of most ppl
Sinistar Ice > and you could end up with a few war decs
Sarkor Nafaar > kk
Sinistar Ice > not worth the isk for me would cost 50mil a week lol
Sarkor Nafaar > ugh
Sinistar Ice > not that it's much but can go to more important stuff lol
Sinistar Ice > alliance ceo
Sarkor Nafaar > yep yep
Sinistar Ice > thought i'd just give you a heads up
Sarkor Nafaar > kk thanks... I'll give him a medal...since we're a ninja corp...
Sinistar Ice > ah lol
Sinistar Ice > was funny first time he showed up
Sinistar Ice > i just killed the trigger and he took the aggro
Sarkor Nafaar > did it kill em?
Sinistar Ice > no he got out
Sarkor Nafaar > cool
Sinistar Ice > angel bs vs a frig they tend to miss
Sarkor Nafaar > did ya shoot as his ass?
Sinistar Ice > nope he didn't steal
Sinistar Ice > just salvaged
Sarkor Nafaar > ah...just salvage...well...that's what a ninja salvager does...ya know!

So we talk for awhile...he didn't seem too bent out of shape that one of the corpies was raping his wrecks...way to go Urkal! I just thought this was funny since the Corp Bio is crystal clear that we are a Ninja Corp...

Thieving Corporation: Pirates, thieves, Ninja Salvers & Ninja Looters, can-flippers, ore thieves,...and general Empire Detritus. We fly around in cheap ships and abscond with un-secured loot, wrecks, and ore. USA East Coast Corp.

Pretty clear what we do...i thought.

Monday, October 19, 2009

Anatomy of Fear

What is fear? It comes in many forms. In EVE, for a lone MR, it manifests itself like this:

Four Frigates warp into my mission room. 4 vs. 1
Numbers=Fear!

Whoa...they have the same corp.
Cohesion=Fear!

They are together and in the same corp...
Organization=Fear!

They are brazenly stealing my stuff.
Courage=Fear!

What is the result....? Helplessness. We can salvage and loot without any reprisals.

All I need now is a frigate with a bigger cargohold...

CRIMINALS!!!!! will be punished.

Why do folks in this game think it's a good idea to shoot me while I'm salvaging? That's right...it's not! It's a colossally stupid idea.

"Hello...ever hear of CONCORD, Dillweed?"

I understand that the 'cost' can be mitigated by insurance...and some folks have gazillions of isk. I also get the time to buy a new ship and fit it out is minimal...but dang...the security hit has really gotta suck for them. It's a no-win situation...costs them isk, costs them time, costs them security, costs them pride (especially if they can't kill me before CONCORD shows up).

Had a dope shoot at me...not at the beginning of my salvaging Op...after. I'd cleaned all the wrecks...done...was going to leave....but no. He had to give me one more wreck...his. I can see shooting me at the begining; I can see shooting me during my thieving...but after?!? Doh.

I don't get it...or...maybe I do.

Maybe it was my tactic of using the "Hi" attack.

What is the "Hi" attack...? shhh...It's a Top Secret Tear Extraction method...

Here's how it works... Say "Hi". That's it. Simple. But Brilliant.

So the dope convos me right as I start taking his wrecks...

[MR] Stop taking my wrecks please...
[Sarkor] Hi
[MR] Please...why are you doing this?
[Sarkor] Hi
[MR] Maybe we can work out a deal?
[Sarkor] Hi
He closes the convo... :-)

Then in Local he starts whining...

[MR] Why do people steal stuff...
[Sarkor] Hi
[MR] You, sir, are a Jackass!
[Sarkor] Hi

Others join the whining, and what do I respond with? Yep, you guessed it! Hi

After 10 minutes of pleading and whining, and my only response was "Hi" to everything he chatted or convo'd...he decided enough was enough.

So...as his Hurricane withered under Concord's guns, and he was sitting in his capsule...he watched in horror as his wreck got salvaged, and his little yellow diamond disappeared also.

Severe tear squirting commenced...

No Tech II stuff for me...but the lols just keep filling my cargohold.

Remember...In EVE, bad things happen to stupid people.

Thursday, October 8, 2009

Playing with new toys...can kill you!

So...I guy I know buys a new expanded probe launcher. "Wow...now I need some probes...ooooo, look...shining new Core Scanner Probes. Since I can't use the Combat Scanner probes just yet, these will do." Off he jets from the safety of our station..."probes away!!"

30 Minutes later.

[Anghorn] I found a Wormhole...Yaaaarrrrr. No guts, no clean-up....

{multiple folks} Whoa...cool. Warpin to ya

[Sarkor] Um...not a good idea...you need to...

[Anghorn] Wow...this is a cool place....it's filled with Nougat.

[Sarkor] Wat?

[Sarkor] Did you go in already?

[Anghorn] Yeah...why...?

[Sarkor] Um...idk...it's a Wormhole to...this is EVE...probably badness
...
[Anghorn] SLEEPERS!!!!!!!!!!! Ambush!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Quite some time later.

[Anghorn] Ok...big problem. I'm in 0.0 space...no gates. I lost the wormhole exit. I know where it is on the map, but i can't fly directly there. I'm fekk'
[Sarkor] lol

{Luckily some of us bookmarked the hi-sec end of the wormhole}

[Sarkor] OK...I'll fly in and then you can warp to me...but first i'm gonna get my scan ship and buy a few core scanners in case the wormhole closes on us. We'll be able to scan our way out.

...

[Sarkor] Ok...i'm in...nice place, but lets get the heck out of here...

[Anghorn] Agreed...too much excitement for one night.

Epic tragedy averted. That's what I like about EVE. Every decison has the potential to really get you into a mess quick. Not like WOW where you can be a complete TARD and continue to be a TARD and have purplez rain from the sky. And if you cry...they send you purplez in the mail. In EVE, lessons are taught swifty and violently. Kinda like being back in Army Basic Training.

On the bright side...
0.0 Space in our backyard, some planets w/moons, no asteroid belts {bah}, and some baddies...we'll have to save WH space for when we can fly something bigger than a destroyer... It's good to know that there is something to look forward to...I'll have to do some more research on these WH things.

Tuesday, October 6, 2009

[Al Pacino]...let meh introduce you to my little friend...

Ah...my ship. My speedy little tear maker. I fly a Vigil. A wicked fast frigate that costs next to nothing...

Turns on a dime...agile little sucka.

Feel the rush...I salvage while the MR tries frantically to tractor his wrecks closer...oops got that one too.

WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA...feel the tears flowing.

Tough to target, quick to the warp-away...high transversal=you missed me!

My little baby gets the job done....can't wait for Salvager IIs

-----------------------------------
My current Fit:

Highs
3 x Salvager Is

Mids
1 x AB
2 x Cap Recharger Is

Lows
2 x Overdrive Injector Systems
1 x Inertia Stabilizer I

Rigs
Polycarbon Engine Housing
Small Aux Thrusters
Small Dynamic Fuel Valve


[to the potential EFT warriors out there...taking your suggestions for better cost per performance]